OWhata

Okay, I know I promised the Open Love Letter to Liz Lemon next, but I just have to write this post now…

Genpets. Holy Shit.  Honestly, my brain tells me that this is a well-engineered hoax, but my brain has been wrong before.

Genpets are a bio-engineered mammals that come in packages like toys.  They are reported on the site as being alive.  The packaging has electronic devices and chemicals hooked into the Genpet to keep them in a perpetual state of hibernation - they are reported to be breathing.  They bleed, they have bones, they make noises - they are alive in every way you and I are (supposedly.)

In all honesty…IF this is real, I think I’d rather be eaten alive by a white tiger wearing a Bill Cosby sweater than be on a planet where this is happening.  But then again - I’m into freedom of evolution and this seems like a hella way to push those genetic doors open to punctuated equillibrium.  READ THIS WEBSITES FAQS!!!!

Dale sent me a few of this guys drawings a while back.  Luckily I still had one on my desktop.  I don’t have a link to a site for him because it was a bitch to Google this guy and come up with the Peter Taylor I was looking for - so find him yourself.

Oh yeah, sorry to have vanished.  Things have been rather odd in James land the past few weeks.  Usually life is either good, bad, or neutral - but never a mixed bag.  Lately, I’ve had the party mix and, although I’m quite happy, I’m looking over my shoulder often.  Here’s a short list of what’s happened lately - hit a guy on his bike with my car, ended my contract after 2 1/2 years at the job, getting more freelance work, finished the first cartoon with my production company and sent it off to Adult Swim, met a great lady (of course she’s moving away soon), clean bill of health at the dentist, great parties with great friends, my back healed so my ankle nearly broke…

So, yeah, I’m sorry and still love you all and love blogging.  I’ll be more regular.

I would give credit to whoever took this photo, but I could find none. Isn’t it just so American?  I mean, really…Yoko Ono praying to Ronald McDonald?

Although author David Wong left out the ENTIRE female side of his taxonomy regarding the human condition of being a Douchebag, THIS ARTICLE at Cracked.com is still quite amusing.  Trust me - two minutes into reading this and you will already recognize that friend you have who totally sucks but you just can’t cut loose because you’ve known him/her too long.  Five minutes in and you’ll recognize half the people you saw at the bar last night.

For those of you who enjoy words.  Insults, courtesy Shakespearean adjectives.

The F.B.I has decided to let one of their agents investigate the case of D.B. Cooper again. For those of you who’ve had your head squarely planted in someone other idiot’s asshole for the past 3 decades, Cooper hijacked a plane, released the passengers for 200 G’s, then kept the crew as hostage to fly him to Mexico City but bailed with a parachute between Seattle and Reno.

First off, aren’t we fighting a war on Terrorism? Even ONE more man investigating terrorists - RATHER than some some non-descript dude desparate AND stupid enough to only ask for 200 Grand and then jump from a plane only to LOSE a portion of the cash in the wilderness - will make me feel a little safer about not having people massacred because they worship Capitalism and happen to be broadly defined as a “Westerner”.

Second - come on…really, just come on already. This is just fucking stupid. A 36-year-old case, beyond-the-statute-of-limitations is suddenly “hot” again? Guess what, so are my testes in May. Let’s all move on, watch Grey’s Stupidity, drink bad German beer that all the plastic people on 20 second clips sip, or whatever lame, Caucasian dogshit that American’s are currently zeitgeisting into the next painfully embarassing fad.

I don’t even recall taking this picture….

Christmas Tree.

Ike Turner.

Hayden Panettiere.